Hey friends!! It has been a while since my last blog and for that I am sorry. I love to blog but don't always have or make time for it. Moving forward I am going to make time. A few friends (Thank you Thea and Marsha) recently pointed out that this would be the best way to update all of our friends and family at the same time.
I have been repeatedly asked "how do you do it?" How do I do what? "How do you grocery shop?" "How do you do the same routine all day everyday without a break?" "Don't you get tired?" "When do you take time for yourself?" "How do you have the energy to work out everyday?" "Do you miss him?" These are just some of the questions that I am asked pretty often and I would love to answer them.
Let's start with grocery shopping. I don't think it is foreign to grocery shopping with children, i just think some people are used to leaving the kids at home with the spouse while they shop. Those people are super blessed because they get to shop in silence and not be rushed. But I think those parents that are like myself who have to take the children because they don't have any other option are truly blessed as well. They get to go on an adventure (this is the term David likes to use when the whole family goes grocery shopping). I know that some people are saying the same thing I have said on many occasions "there is no adventure in taking the children grocery shopping" but I do believe there can be when we just slow down. I use 2 carts when we go to the commissary. I refer to these carts as "baby jail" and Nico rides in the front of one and Jacoby in the other. I get glares because I have two carts but they don't know why I have two carts. My Husband has been in another country for 10 months, I don't have family here, and I refuse to use my time while the babysitter is at my house to go grocery shopping. It did use to stress me out when I would shop but that was because my children were running in front of people and their carts, grabbing glass items off of the shelf, and fighting over who could push our one shopping cart. Problem solved with two carts, I push one and Mateo pushes the other. We go slower than I like and I now give in when the kids want junk food or a squeaky dog toy to play with (even though we have no dog). I also go up the candy aisle before we go up any other aisle so they can each pick out a box or bag of candy. Somehow them seeing it and holding it the whole trip makes them behave. If they throw a fit or act up they have to put back and don't get anything. Yes, this may sometimes backfire and cause a temper tantrum but more times than not it works out wonderfully for us. On the days we grocery shop I don't cook dinner. So this means once a week or every other week I don't cook, and it is amazing and I look forward to this night. I take full advantage of the chick-fila app and order my food while we are still in the parking lot at the commissary. I swing by and pick up the food, and the children eat there dinner in the car while watching a movie and I get to unload all of the groceries without children under my feet. for all of you grandparents out there worrying that my child may choke and I may not hear them I am back and forth to the car and we all go inside once the car is unloaded. I do let them unload the car with our small trips to the store, they love to help. This my friends is how I survive grocery shopping by myself.
Now let's talk about how I handle monotony and energy to exercise since they kind of go hand and hand. Yes, our mornings and evenings are usually about the same but a random temper tantrum or the spilling of a beverage tends to really break up the routine. Or a diaper blowout or the crumbling up of a siblings paper airplane. People, you have not seen the end of the world from a child's eyes until a sibling crushes a newly made paper airplane. Or the best thing to break up our day is if Nico runs in to Jacoby's bedroom, grabs one of his favorite lego guys, disassembles it within seconds and throws the pieces all over the room in different directions. Jacoby will melt down until every piece is found and y'all every piece can't be found unless I clean that room. So once again, this breaks up my routine and helps me to maintain a clean house. Going to the gym also breaks up our day. Although it is routine for us to go five days a week the days are never the same. The workers rotate, my exercises change, and depending on if we go in the morning or afternoon determines how the children behave while I am working out. I started back at the gym about two months after David left for Turkey. Initially it was for that daily one hour break to myself but it has turned into so much more. My gym has become like a family to me. Some of the employees may not know this but when they ask me how I am doing it makes my day and sometimes my week. They are truly sincere. They have expressed feelings that they couldn't separate from their spouse for this amount of time. We share stories. We laugh. I have cried. Our children play together. They watch my children almost daily, and I know they are in great hands and I never need to worry. Going to the gym gives me energy and strength to keep up with my boys. Taking care of my body means I will hopefully be around just a little longer to watch them grow.
Do I get tired? Yes! Do I take time for myself? Yes!! There are some days that I feel like I am running on fumes. Days I have to consume an afternoon cup of coffee just to make it to the boys bedtime. Of course I am exhausted. I am doing the job of two people right now. I wouldn't change any of this for the world. For the experiences that we have all gone through this past year it has made us closer as a family and strengthened our marriage. It has also brought me closer to God. It has taught me that there is no place in our lives for worrying or arguments. Life is way to short. If I get to FaceTime with David once a week I don't want to waste them on things that aren't truly important. I do take time for myself. The past few months I take several hours once a week. I know people that never do this, even when their spouses are home. It truly is something that everyone needs. It helps to reenergize you both mentally and physically. We all can be the best person that God intended us to be when we take care of ourselves.
So with all of this being said there is so much more going on in my life than just what meets the eye. I have lost two grandfathers in the past month, both to cancer. One fought the disease for 14 months and the other was diagnosed too late in the disease to do any fighting at all. We are preparing to ship our entire house overseas. This is both exciting and overwhelming at the same time. "Doesn't the military pay for movers to come do it all for you?" Yes, but that doesn't make it any easier. The team of movers will come to our house for several days and go room by room through all of my stuff and pack everything. This is great but also quite violating. Those of you eye rolling and wondering how it could be violating probably all have that drawer filled with junk, or a filing cabinet with papers from the last twenty years that you no longer need, or that closet that has been your children's catch all since you moved into the house. After reading tons of blogs I have learned and heeded the advice to go through each room before the move. Dejunk all of those drawers, throw away trash (important papers that can all be found electronically), clean under the beds, and pass on things that are no longer needed.
I am most excited to have my family living together under one roof. I am excited to be learning Italian. David said he will be good as long as I am there to translate. Haha just wait until he needs a toilette (restroom) for an emergency I may just have to watch him squirm before translating. I am also trying to mentally prepare myself for a 16 hour flight with the three boys. I have read a ton of blogs on this topic and feel like I am almost prepared. If not, I have a ton of backup new Lego guys that I am bringing in my carryon. Anyone who know Nico and Jacoby knows that they will survive 16 hours with just a few new Legos.
Please feel free to drop any advice, tips, or tricks that can make my life easier for the move down below in the comments. I ask most importantly for prayers. Prayers that our move goes smooth, that we have a safe flight, and that we find the best place for our family to live once we get there. Stay tuned and I will give many updates on our journey to Aviano, Italy.
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